tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4059077432036354029.post8596805294264350421..comments2023-08-22T22:10:42.197-07:00Comments on your first page: The Season of White FliesPeter Selginhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03493565026700541812noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4059077432036354029.post-79269412024147831072011-01-29T06:20:26.217-08:002011-01-29T06:20:26.217-08:00This assessment is dead-on. These particular issue...This assessment is dead-on. These particular issues are often issues for this author. And she is re-doing her opening with these words as the good flashlight in which to light the cave entry that begins a novel. <br /><br />Thanks for the smart, thorough and tough advice. (And the fabulous interpretation of a poem of mine you once read.)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4059077432036354029.post-51309910632109529842010-09-06T19:11:43.338-07:002010-09-06T19:11:43.338-07:00I like the imagery of the first paragraph, but not...I like the imagery of the first paragraph, but not that it is one huge, run-on sentence. The second paragraph obviously has nothing to do with the first, so I'm lost. I honestly don't have the foggiest idea of what the author is talking about in either paragraph. <br /><br />But I'd like to. I really hope she re-does her opening.Terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04439479882563807485noreply@blogger.com